Applebees.avi

I was walking down the street when I saw an Applebees Restaurant. Considering the time and my hunger, I walked in and was directed to a seat. I ordered a coke and the American Standard burger because it looked good. While I was waiting for my food, I decided to go and wash my hands. Walking in the men's room door, I saw something odd in the mirror. There was a USB in the urinal! "Why would anyone leave a USB in a urinal?!?!" I asked myself out loud, shouting at the top of my lungs. "Shut the hell up, I'm trying to take a shit!" Harshly stated a heavyset man in a stall.
I grabbed the USB in the urinal, and carefully cleaned it as to disinfect it without ruining it. After washing my hands and putting the USB in my pocket, I strolled back to my seat. My food arrived very quickly, and I loved every bite of it. Paying for my food, I thanked the waiter and left a generous tip.
When I arrived at my house, I immediately plugged in the USB. It contained one file which was titled Applebees.avi. Thinking this was strange, I opened it. I wish I didn't... A video played showing an apple sitting on a small wooden table. Slowly, the apple rotted away, and a colony of bees took over the apple. This took about two minutes and three and a half seconds. A picture popped up of an American Standard burger for 5.0096 seconds. How did they know I picked that burger? Text appeared on screen that said: "American standard burgers are use human meat!" After that, the scariest text in the history of ever appeared: "

SEE YOU TOMORROW

!" I suddenly realized I had accidentally joined a cannibalistic cult. I had to go back the next day, it told me to! It knew what I ordered. Was it all set up by the waiter, I don't know. I just know that I am now trapped in a cycle of cannibalism, weight gain, and wasting money. At least the food tastes good. Well... it did. Now, the human flavor really comes forth with a strong and distinct taste.
Yesterday, the worst thing ever happened in Applebees. I walked in, ordered the American Standard burger, then I went to the bathroom. This time, I tossed that USB in the urinal and sat down in a stall because I am fat as hell. The door opened. A man suddenly exclaimed "Why would anyone leave a USB in a urinal?!?!" Without thinking, I immediately replied "Shut the hell up, I'm trying to take a shit!"... I accidentally recruited a new member.