One day, I died… Just kidding, but now I’m going to have some copyright issues. On to the story. Three day, I got a Razer Sabertooth controller. I have a friend name Morgan who gave it to me. He was my best friend, we defeated the Illuminati. Morgan (the only one that matters is Atticus) had children now and we were visiting his house for the day. He was married to Amy. He is 36 and she is in middle school. Ms. Billet had retired and had daily intercourse with Kazu (he’s like 107 now). And I have many children (no fucking shit). I have about 128 kids with Nepgear, 64 with Miku, and 192 with Lucy. That’s 384 kids! But if you read the previous stories, then you’d expect that from me. LOL. Anyways, onto the important details.
My cat, Nigel, was doing something on my carpet. He was stretched out playing with Nepgear’s N-Gear. I picked it up and looked on the main screen. She apparently started a program called, ‘RazerSynapseSetup1-9001.exe.dll.cs.exe.exe.edu.razer.sabertoothcontroller.grandtheftautov.tingtangwallawallabingbang.supercalifragilisticexpialidocus’. I was scared, and almost crapping myself. I did not know where Nepgear was. I called my best friend Morgan, and he came to my house the next second. I was wondering if he was living under my house. Next, Pedobear wearing a horse head was harassing Rom and Ram. They were my younger sisters. WHAT! Plot twist! Does that mean that Blanc is my sister? The world may never… Yeah, she’s my sister. Morgan was making a yearbook with all the people in his grade who died. I snapped him out of just screwing around, and I yelled to him, “Where the fuck is Nepgear!!” He gave a nonchalant, “I don’t know”, and left the room. There was a train with a triangle on it. Motherfucker! Not the Illuminati again! Morgan and I got onto our horse, which was Pedobear, and rode to the front of the train. Pedobear tripped, and we fell to the ground. “All we had to do is follow the damn train, Pedobear!!” Jack yelled.
No-face from Spirited Away was watching us in the forest. He was holding the manifesto for the train. It was heading for Nunavut Bay. Holy shit! Are we going to meet Jean Bison from Sly 2? The world may never… Spoiler Alert, we are. Morgan, Pedobear, Rom, Ram, No-face, and I packed up to go to Nunavut Bay. We took the trip by plane. In the middle of the flight, we crashed in Nunavut Bay. Jon Stewart was there, and he was watching the train. “Hey, is that your wife?” Jon asked me. I replied, “How the fuck did you know!?” He gave no answer, but he would provide sniper fire while we sneak in there and get Nepgear. No-face would be a distraction, Morgan will put the Jar Jar cutout in the back doorway, and I will sneak into the building on the side, and get Nepgear. So No-face and Morgan got into position, and the Jar Jar cutout got knocked out. A line appeared with the text, ‘Wasted’, on it.
We restarted at the beginning, and tried again. This time the Jar Jar cutout didn’t get knocked out, and I snuck in and grabbed Nepgear. I got out of the warehouse. Sniper fire could be heard. Jon apparently shot Uhcakip.exe! So he was down. Cats appeared on a big screen. “Hahaha! All your wifes are belong to us! You have no chance to get wife, make you’re time!” Well, shit! He has the rest of my wives as well. By the way, that was horrible grammar. “NO FUCKING SHIT!!! IT TOOK YOU THIS LONG TO NOTICE!!!” Morgan yelled. No-face pulled out another manifesto, and it said that the crew is going to Hoenn. We did not know where that was, until Lucario came out of a bush, and took us there. He took us to Cameron Palace from Lucario and the Mew.
We found out that Voldemort was running the operation here. He took my other wife, Miku, and hid her in a room. He tried to torture her like in Grand Theft Auto V. Mr. K was there as well. Voldemort was working with Steve Haines. We apparently knew everything, because No-face has every manifesto of each place. So we headed to Cameron Palace, and we saw Jean Bison. He evacuated Nunavut Bay, because we took Nepgear, and he got kicked out by Sly Cooper. “So Sly is on our team now?” Morgan asked. Cameron Palace was guarded by over 9000 Vegetas (Definitely not taken from another story). Cave from Neptunia MK2 was undercover at the ball. We somehow got into the ball. Some guy said to us at the entrance, “It’s a trap!” Mr>Blacker came out with his lightsaber again, and Magic Mike came back. He pulled out his lightsaber and started fighting Mr>Blacker. While they were busy, we snuck down to the room, and some silhouette said, “Oh, hi Mark!” We saw Miku and Mr. K tied up to chairs. We untied them and Voldemort came out from the darkness. “Hahaha! I’m am the lord of darkness, and you can’t beat me!” Steve came out from behind him. “Agent Steve Haines here, and by those looks, you’re never getting out of here.” Sniper fire could be heard. Trevor Philips was outside providing sniper fire. He got a headshot on Steve, and he fell to the ground. Voldemort said, “Oh… Shit!” As Magic Mike and Mr>Blacker fell down on him, and he died. Sly managed to get $2,147,483,264 off of Voldemort. No-face showed us another manifesto. The next member was at Point Barrow, Alaska. Awesome (sarcasm), we’re going to the Spoiled States of America!
On the manifesto, it said that Robotnik was the leader of this place. He had my third wife, Lucy from Elfen Lied, and he was holding her up in an oil derrick. Why couldn’t No-face show us the rest of the manifestos. The world may never… He pulls out the last manifesto, and it says that the supreme leader is on the summit of Mount Everest. The supreme leader is Cats. But we had to focus on Robotnik, and getting Lucy back. Point Barrow was a mile away from Cameron Palace. So we took a rental car there. We saw that Robotnik was on his stand, giving orders to his pingas. Sniper fire could be heard, but it didn’t hit Robotnik. Sonic was holding the rifle. Morgan yelled, “Your accuracy is not sexy, and you don’t have sexy eyes. You are not Sonic.sexy!” Sonic ran away, crying. Robotnik said, “Hahaha! You don’t have anything to defend yourselves! Prepare to die!” Sniper fire could be heard. Rom held the rifle (even though it was twice her size), and Ram was the spotter. Rom shot Robotnik, and he died. No-face showed us the last manifesto, even though we knew where and what we’d be doing. And we packed up to go to the Himalayas.
We crashed into Mount Everest, and climbed to the top. Jar Jar showed up. He gave me a gun. We barged into his palace. “Hahaha! You me found!” Cats said. Sniper fire could be heard. This time it was Jon Stewart, Trevor Philips, and Rom shooting at him, but they all missed. I started fighting Cats. I shot him in the head and he died. We went back to my house a celebrated. We heard my doorbell. I walked to the door, and it was… Obama! “Thank you, smaller good team! You defeated the Illuminati… Again. And you will be rewarded.” He drove off. We were happy that the Illuminati was gone. And I realized that I had a triangular speaker!
The End!